Ever hear of an epic fail?
It’s not just a failure, it’s a failure of epic proportions. It’s the pyramid of failures, the Eiffel Tower, the Great Wall.
Get the picture?
Now add me to the picture. If you don’t know what I look like just picture a leprechaun for now (that’s pretty close). See me? Standing there pretending to hold up my leaning Tower of Failure while wearing a fanny pack (that makes the failure more epic, don’t you think)?
Well, my failure came the other night, when after an awful day of torture (waitressing), I was at the bar enjoying
shots a beer when I noticed a guy that I knew through my older sister. I smiled, re-introduced myself, made the normal pleasantries and went back to drinking with one of my co-workers.
I didn’t think much about it. Well, I did think: “Damn, he’s cute.” But that was about it.
That was, until he moved over to start talking to me.
One thing led to another and I ended up driving him home because he couldn’t drive safely.
“Want to come inside?” he asked.
“Um, sure.” I had seen enough episodes of Sex and the City to know that usually meant something was going to happen. But I was conflicted as to whether I wanted to do anything. He was drunk. For all I knew this was just because he had no other options for the evening and I have a strict “no one night stand” clause these days.
I didn’t want him to regret a decision he had made while drinking.
So I went in and stood at least two awkward feet away from him at all times and let him show me his house. Then he walked me to my car.
The moment the door closed I regretted it. This guy was a catch and I knew that I had let him go like a child who didn’t want to keep the fish she had just reeled in. I was tempted to get out of the car, kiss this boy and give up all my fears.
But my fears run deep and I stayed with my hands at 10 and 2 on the steering wheel and drove myself home.
You bet your ass.
And if he comes back and is interested a second time you better believe that I won’t hold back again.